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“We tell lies when we are afraid - afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger.”

                                            ~ Tad Williams

Telling lies is a vehicle commonly used for avoiding responsibility and being held accountable for our words and our actions. We may tell lies to deflect attention away from ourselves or to actually cast it onto someone else. The problem is that when we lie we have to remember what lie we told and to whom. When we never lie we never have to remember what we said because the truth never changes. So now you can see that responsibility become synonymous with telling the truth. 

We use the word responsibility in place of Blame on the Wasted Energies page for a good reason. The word Blame is the negative term we use when we want to hold someone else liable for a bad decision or something that went wrong, and we use responsibility as the positive term for when we stand tall to be held accountable for our own decisions and our own actions. It only makes sense doesn’t it? Blame is such an ugly word, whereas responsibility seems so much more mature, almost commanding respect. Blame identifies the scapegoat or the person who screwed up and responsibility identifies the person who wants to be held accountable. It is for that very reason that we categorize Blame on the Wasted Energies page and we give responsibility its own head line right here. Think of it like this: we cast Blame, and we take responsibility. Blame is humiliating, whereas responsibility is a badge of honor. 

When you’re casting Blame keep in mind that we also mentioned on the Teaching Page under the God’s Grace Story that “when you point a finger at someone else three fingers are still pointing straight back at you”. Ask yourself if you have any role in the present situation? Could any of the Blame you’re casting possibly be your responsibility? An initial introspective look at your role in the situation may help you to swallow your own pride and take some responsibility before lashing out at another.

Even if you do have the need or a motive to point out where someone else went wrong, taking responsibility for your role as well will give a measure of credibility to your story and illustrate that you’re not simply throwing somebody else under the bus, but merely explaining how the situation developed to the point in which it now sits.

Most people are smart enough to know that if you just Blame someone else you’re most likely covering your own ass and not giving up the “rest of the story”. Why? Because if you’re just casting Blame that will appear as though you’re making an attempt to deflect attention away from any role or responsibility that may be yours and most people recognize that effort. On the other hand though, if you can swallow your pride long enough to take responsibility for your part people will more readily believe everything else you have to say.

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